The Pig came to live with us about 15 years ago. Before he had lived on the Boots small animal farm at their shop in Lincoln.

At first he lived in the car ( a Peugeot 205) which he thought was his. He came with us on holiday to France where we took pity on him one dark and stormy night and brought him indoors. We haven’t been able to get him to sleep in the car since – he seems to think the gap between the pillows on our bed is far more to his liking. Mind you he still thinks any money left in the car belongs to him.
Now the Pig goes everywhere we go. He even goes to work with Jane, though he doesn’t help much with this as he can’t read or write or count (no matter what he claims).

We got Balloon 14 years ago. He arrived in a balloon having been rescued from a show somewhere. He was born in Branston near Lincoln in the front room of a little cottage. It was all rather traumatic, as the balloon got very tight when the air was let out and it was a real struggle to free him from it. Balloon has never forgotten his origins however and always gets very excited whenever he sees a balloon.

As a small bear Balloon was very timid. He tended to be the one picked on by the others and showed no signs of being the bossy little so and so he has turned out to be in his latter years. Indeed so fainthearted was this little bear that he rarely went out and cringed even if his name was mentioned.

As he grew older he started to come out of himself – some might say a little too much as now there are no bounds to this bear’s cheek. Once he had grown out of being a cub he developed a total lack of sense – the words “no fear” was a slogan written around this bear!

We started taking the Bear to rugby matches around ten years ago, though he was a big fan well before that, having watched it on the TV. It is now just about his bestest thing , he thinks Welford Road is a Temple and that a trip to see the Tigers play is a religious experience. He wears an England rugby shirt with the number 8 on the back, homage to his hero Dean Richards who he has met, which was his proudest moment. Deano signed Balloon’s shirt, and we had to use a blowtorch to prise it off the little tinker’s back!

The Bear likes the Pig, but very rarely admits it. He is more likely to demonstrate his affection through a boot up the arse when the Pig isn’t expecting it. The fights that then develop are always explained as “axibumps” with the Bear steadfastly refusing to accept any blame whatsoever.

Originating from Yorkshire, Little Brown is an intelligent, articulate and (mostly) sensible bear. He is very clever and knows everything there is to know about cooking (at least he thinks he does). Can be a little spiky if he is prevented from watching cookery programmes.

In fact cooking is an obsession with this Bear. Cookery programmes on TV especially Gary Rhodes, Jamie Oliver and Keith Floyd are his favourites – and he loves to watch UK TV Food channel all day given half a chance.
Like the Pig and Bear he loves films with shooting, blowing things up etc etc. Needless to say, Steven Seagal in the Under Siege movies is his hero. (“I also cook”). His big plus point is that he can cope with a little more plot in a film than the other three, though we also suspect his greater intelligence makes him the most dangerous of the gang as we suspect he has learnt how to use the TV remote control.

Finally, what can we say about Rodney? A Lincolnshire Rhino, Rodney is a gentle soul who doesn’t know his own strength especially when practising scrumaging with the Pig, Balloon and Little Brown. He is the youngest member of the gang and the most timid. Rodney is devoted to the Pig and has, sadly, been led astray by him to some extent. The Pig often enlists Rodney’s help with surprise attacks on Balloon Bear – these can end in tears. He is always sorry after the event but will do it all over again when the Pig instigates another raid.

Rod loves planes and used to love watching the Red Arrows display team practice from his bedroom window. Rod wears a number 1 on his rugby shirt as he's very much a little prop forward. Like Little Brown though he never leaves the house - well occasionally he peeps his head out of the door if he hears an interesting helicopter.